Trivial Things That Irk Me About Food

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On the whole food is a wonderful thing, I mean I couldn’t live without it, literally. It brings no little pleasure and joy to my life. But there are things about food, really trivial first world things that irk me. Things that in the grand scheme of things aren’t really worth mentioning, but I will, here are some that spring to mind;

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  1. Tortilla wraps that are stuck together and no matter how delicately you try to separate them you know deep down that they will rip sooner or later leaving you with one holey wrap and one stodgy wrap, both substandard wraps.
  2. Mandarins that have more than one pip per segment, if I were a mandarin farmer I’d be very happy about these pip producing fruit but I’m not I’m a Daddy that has to remove each and every one.
  3. Squeezing every unripened avocado on the supermarket shelf and by the time you find ‘the one’ you’re so full of rage that you squeeze it so hard you ruin the damn thing.
  4. There are few foodie things that irk me like cutting into a poached egg and instead of gloopy yolk seeping over my toast it sort of crumbles and stubbornly refuses to budge.
  5. Opening pickle jars could be an event at World’s Strongest Man. Why is it that pickles need to be so tightly contained that opening them turns your face a purple?
  6. Opening the butter tub after the familiar pop of the toaster only to find it is all gone. There is a moment’s debate as to whether enough can be scraped to salvage this breakfast related disaster before you give up and settle for a bowl of stale cereal instead.
  7. The rogue mouldy carrot that turns the entire bag to mush mildly irritates me, there’s one in every packet.
  8. Biting into what you hoped would be succulent chicken and crunching down on some sort of gristly connective tissue is particularly unpleasant.
  9. Topping and tailing green beans is a tiresome task, can’t you all just be the same size?
  10. Opening a carton of eggs and finding that half are mysteriously glued to the bottom of the carton, not enough to make any mess and alert you to the problem but just enough to question whether you should eat them.
  11. Playing and failing at Freezer Tetris as you try to fit a box of Magnums into the last remaining space, which is a small triangle.

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Can you relate? What’s on your trivial food gripe list?

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  • http://awesomelyunprepared.com/ KezUnprepared

    Haha the avocado one really resonates with me!!! I’m that customer that reaches to the back of the pile where they hide the good ones ;)
    I’d like to add when supermarket employees cut open boxes of frozen foods with stanley knives and nick what seems like ALL of the bags of frozen peas, beans and oven chips – again, making you doubt whether you should eat them or not because you only ever notice the nicks when you get home.

    • daddownunder

      That’s if there’s any left that haven’t been deposited through the boot of your car Kez. They can be a bit trigger happy with their Stanley knives can’t they.

  • http://emhawker.blogspot.com/ Emily

    Getting home to discover that the lid of the milk wasn’t on properly. And it’s now through your whole boot. And you think you’ll clean it tomorrow. STINKATHON.

    • daddownunder

      Sounds like that’s quite a fresh memory Emily : ) Nothing worse than milk in the car on a hot day, actually baby vomit in the car on a hot day narrowly beats it

  • http://dadsthewayilikeit.wordpress.com/ Jonathan Ervine

    Totally agree with you about the tortilla wraps. I’d also add to the list tortilla wraps (or cheese) that is in a supposedly re-sealable packet that doesn’t re-seal properly (e.g. doesn’t stick down properly, seal comes off even if you open it carefully).

    • daddownunder

      I’ve wasted far too much of my life trying and failing to do that very thing Jonathan, some sort of Velcro system could be the go : )

  • Dominique

    I hate the dried crunchy bits around the lid of the milk bottle that go all over the bench when you open it. It’s like milk dandruff on my clean bench… annoys the hell out of me!

    • daddownunder

      I know exactly what you mean Dom. From this day forth it will forever be known as milk dandruff in my house

  • Diana

    There is a solution for the avocado squishing. At the top of an avocado is a little brown circle where it connects to the stem. If you pull it out you can tell if the avocado is ripe or over ripe. If it’s a nice green colour it’s ripe, but if it’s brown you know it is over ripe. If it’s a real pale green then it’s still not ripe enough. Also if you don’t need an avacado do for a meal for another two days or more just put an underripe avacado in a brown paper bag and leave it in the fruit bowl. The other fruit helps it finish ripening. :) I grew up in Phoenix Arizona and pretty much half of my diet growing up consisted of guacamole!!! :D

    • daddownunder

      You really know your stuff Diana, I’ll try these tips next time. I didn’t grow up in Pheonix but half my diet is still guacamole : ) I did fly into Pheonix once to visit friends in Prescott, I love your home state

      • Diana

        Prescott is beautiful. I call Perth Western Australia home now, and after 13 years of looking for decent Mexican Food here have yet to find it, so have been forced to make it myself ;) My hubby and I love your blog! We are parents to 5 kids under 10 years old so find your humour very relatable! :D

        • daddownunder

          Melbourne is gripped in a Mexican food love affair right now – lots of great restaurants popping up. Thanks very much Diana, I’m sure with 5 under 10 you’d have plenty of stories yourself – all the best

  • Erica @ recycled fashion

    You buy a punnet of strawberries, and the next day, find a few at the bottom that appear to have mould growing on them that was not there the day before, thus ruining half the punnet… so frustrating.

    • daddownunder

      So true Erica, there’s probably some sort of technique to avoid this if you know your strawbs but I don’t : ) I usually freeze them and throw them in a smoothie

      • Alicia-OneMotherHen

        lol that’s so Jamie Oliver of you :) Clever all the same.

  • Alicia-OneMotherHen

    You have touched on so many irks. The most useful thing in my junk draw is my freeby score from a tupperware party, the jar opener orange square thingy, go to a party and go for that thing at the freeby grab! The tortilla sticking is an irk of my working in a take away shop and being in a short order hurry of sorts and having them stick to each other…ANNOYING!!!….and as for the egg breakage, I just fry the feck out of it and serve it up to the kids!…otherwise chuck it in something that will have it completely cooked eg.cake, quiche, etc. unless it is a questionable shade of green. The watery soft(rotten) tomato in a pack of perfectly ripe ones gives me the shites!! Here’s hoping for lots of homegrown luscious perfect tomatoes this year :)

    • daddownunder

      I’ll look out for those Tupperware parties Alicia, love a freebie of any kind. Homegrown tomatoes are a real treat, they a tally taste of tomato for a start, have you planted yet?

      • Alicia-OneMotherHen

        I have planted two in the last week. They are self seeded by my mum in her hot house, she suggested not planting them in the ground until the stem had turned a purply colour. No doubt I will probably get tomatoes from her garden too. I’m enjoying broad beans from mine at the moment.

  • http://whoa-mumma.blogspot.com/ Alex aka Whoa Mumma!

    Oh all of the above!!! Bloody tortillas.

  • http://www.sarahdipitydotnet.wordpress.com/ Sarahdipity

    Oh those damn tortilla wraps!